A boundaries group activity for adults

Keep the focus on a choice people can understand

A boundaries discussion can quickly become a debate about difficult relationships. For this example, keep the task narrower: help participants compare ways to express a participation choice and clear up a misunderstanding.

The example below comes from GroupReady’s released Boundaries session. It uses fictional people, so nobody needs to describe a private relationship. It is intended for professionals and supervised trainees facilitating adult behavioral-health or addiction groups, within their training and setting’s policies.

Start with the picnic

Read the situation aloud, then offer these possible responses from the lesson:

• “Please check with me before posting a picture of me.”
• “I’m sitting this one out. I don’t want pictures of me online.”
• “Please don’t be mad at me for saying no.”
• “I can take the photo, but I don’t want to be in it.”

Ask: “Which words would help Erin say what she means? What would you keep or change?” People can speak, think privately, listen, or pass. There is no single sentence everyone must choose.

Explore what each response does

The first response asks Zee to do something. The second states what Erin will take part in. The third asks for reassurance but does not clearly state her choice. The last adds an offer that may be welcome if she actually wants to make it.

Stay curious about why someone prefers a line. If a participant likes offering to take the photo, ask whether Erin wants that job or feels she owes a favor for saying no. Offering help is not automatically a problem; an unwanted promise is worth noticing.

Another useful question is: “What could make even a short no difficult to say?” Leave room for answers such as disappointing a friend or standing out. Clear words do not have to sound perfectly confident.

If the discussion turns into whether Erin has a good enough reason, return to the task. The group is considering clarity and respect, not voting on her preference.

Try a brief clarification

Invite a volunteer to suggest Erin’s first response. Then introduce Zee’s misunderstanding: “Are you heading home?”

One possible reply from the lesson is: “No, I’m staying. I’m just skipping the photo.” Ask what the clarification changes for the listener.

You can model the exchange yourself. Keep it to the supplied misunderstanding rather than asking a partner to invent pressure. Close by inviting people to keep a phrase that sounds natural to them. No real-life confrontation or conversation is assigned.

Keep ordinary practice separate from unsafe situations

This example concerns an optional photo. Clear wording cannot guarantee agreement or safety. If someone brings up coercion, threats, or fear of retaliation, stop treating that situation as a practice exchange and arrange appropriate private support under your setting’s procedures. Responsibility for abuse belongs to the person using it.

The choice to use fictional material is consistent with the emphasis on control, choice, and collaboration in SAMHSA’s TIP 57, Chapter 1. This article demonstrates part of an educational session; it does not establish a clinical outcome.

Open the complete Boundaries group

Boundaries is included free in GroupReady, alongside Acceptance. Both offer complete 30- and 60-minute sessions, a Facilitator Guide, matching printable participant materials, and Facilitator Mode.

To prepare, open Boundaries in the app, choose the duration, and read the full session and preparation guidance. Open Handout & Print Materials for the matching materials, then lead from the printed guide or Facilitator Mode.

The complete printable materials are available in the app; this page is a worked example, not a website download. GroupReady is available in the U.S. for iPhone and iPad.

See what the curriculum includes.

More help for your next group

• Planning a 30-minute recovery group
• When nobody is talking in group